Sex Talk: They Who Must Not Be Named
Avni Gupta contemplates the tradition of nicknaming one’s sexual body parts and replacing them with quirky terms during the sex talk.
Slang seems to be the most prevalent when we’re talking about sex or anything remotely related to the activity. Today’s generation prefers euphemisms over the correct terminology for genitalia. A brief round of interviews revealed an outré set of terms being used as replacements for “penis, vagina, breasts, sex” during sex talk.
The Euphemisms
- Some claimed to refer to breasts as “fluffies, bosoms, itsy-bitsy, yum-yums, jugs, and melons – besides the more typical terms like boobs and tits”.
- Vagina has been replaced with gentler words like “strawberry, love-hole, hot tunnel, pussy, coochie, yoni, WAP, pussy, garden, donut, muffin, kitty, and cookie”. External lady-bits are nicknamed as “fuck-flaps, flower, curtain, beaver, lily, pearl, and twinkle”.
- Penis is generally replaced with a variety of words “instruments (pipe, flute, and drumstick), “machines (drill, grinder, rocket, hammer, and hose), weapons (gun and pistol), food items (meat, sausage, cucumber, noodle, banana, banana, brinjal, mushroom, and meat-truck), toys (yo-yo and joystick), animals (rabbit, bunny, horse, cock, ducky, snake, and worm)”. The “weapon of destruction” is even nicknamed as monster and dragon. Testes are commonly referred to as “nutbag, nuts, bullets, and eggs”.
- For sex, people have claimed to use or heard phrases such as “Let’s game! Bang-bang! Tap that ass! Netflix and chill!”, other than “screw, fornicate, hump, poke, and smash”.
Old habits die hard
Gen Z is known to utilise replacement terms for sex – but this practice is not restricted to our generation. It was persistent even in the earlier times, as reported by the author, Jonathon Green. The English-speaking world’s leading lexicographer spent all his life studying slang terminology. Jonathon Green is known for creating two interactive timelines which trace slang words for human genitalia. He has chronicled innumerable ways vagina and penis have been spoken throughout history as digital timelines. His epic Urban dictionary titled Green’s Dictionary of Slang, published in 2010, enlists almost 10.3 million words that have been used as slang for the past five centuries.
In the 1500s, boys may have referred to their parts as giblets and kicky-wickies, while girls would have called theirs’ the Venus’s highway. Coming to the 1600s, flip-flap and tuzzy-muzzy took over as the cutesy nicknames. Further, they were replaced with doodle and kitty in 1700s, gingling Johnnie and that there in 1800s, wee-wee and jelly in 1900s, and finally, soldier and baby chute in 2000s.
And you thought winky and jay–jay were weird?
The introduction of the official terms only dates back to the mid-20th century – one finds testicles in 1425 and copulation in 1483. Penis was not recorded until 1578, vagina until 1682, and finally, sexual intercourse till 1753.
Is slang (un)safe?
Parents act as shield for their children – they ensure love, care, growth, and most of all, protection. Parenting is often accompanied by coming up with inventive nicknames for their kids’ genitals, and other private parts. They believe it is too early to teach their child appropriate words, which might end up being embarrassing for them. They don’t want their kid to scream, “My vagina hurts!” while cramming at McDonalds!
However, it is important to highlight that using replacement words by parents can make a young child think that there is something wrong or embarrassing in their body. They end up being insecure about their body and especially sexual body parts. Silly pseudo-names can also lead to disrespect for sex and normalizes sexual objectification. The children are more protected when they know the anatomically correct terms as it promotes body positivity and self-confidence. Besides self-image, it improves their communication with parents. When parents lay a strong, solid foundation, kids are more likely to openly get involved in family conversations, ultimately enhancing the bond between them.
Experts claim that teaching euphemisms for private parts are acceptable when a child is up to 2 years old. Words like “front, bum, and weiner” are suggested for usage until the child is old enough to understand the actual terms, also called the Grade 1 recommendation. “Penis, vagina, vulva, and buttocks” must be taught as one teaches eyes, ears, fingers, toes.
Empowering Children
Teaching appropriate terms empowers children. As it has been reported that the kids who are aware of the terminologies are more likely to disclose an incident of sexual abuse. It protects the child if he/she faces an uncomfortable or worrisome situation. Right words help the child in understanding what is happening around them. Sexual predators are known to avoid children who know and use the appropriate names for their genitals. Being able to call one’s private parts as they are, indicates that the child has been educated about sexuality and safety. The offender understands that the child has a strong relationship and comfort zone built with parents, thus creating hesitation.
While people continue to euphemize in various situations – especially via emojis for Gen Z, speaking bluntly can eliminate any stigma attached to one’s sexual health. Until imbibed in the sexual education curriculum, it is the responsibility of the parents to teach a child the appropriate sexual terms.
Author
