Masturbation for women: Is self-pleasure selfish?
While cultural constraints and normative social expectations have always negated women’s sexual cravings, deeming it to be a taboo of shame and guilt, masturbation remains one of the best ways to indulge in self-love, knowing one’s own body better, enriching one’s emotional and physical health while improving the quality of sex life. Generally masturbation refers to the self-stimulation of genitals in asexual manner such that it reaches a point of orgasm. The moral and ethical obligations of the Indian society often impinge on the sexual desires of individuals, especially women which otherwise forms a crucial part of one’s normal growth and development. Hence, one needs to approach the issue with a rational lense without pre-biased notions.
Why Should You Prioritise Pleasure?
Besides women indulging in sexual cravings, masturbation has other inherent benefits associated with it if one “chose” to prioritise pleasure. It releases “feel good hormones” like dopamine and oxytocin, which reduce stress and relieves depression levels. It also prevents cervical and urinary tract infections.
Often pictured as a retrogressive act which is subtly veiled in public, masturbation can actually help in developing a positive relation with one’s own body, promoting a healthy self-image and greater acceptance of one’s body. This reverberates through increased self-confidence and greater self-expression of one’s identity. Besides, it can also play a crucial role in improving the quality of sleep and treating insomnia. The orgasmic contractions help in strengthening the “pelvic floor”. Masturbation is an effective means of “safe sex”, devoid of the risks of pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases. Thus, if you crave for the right blend of intimacy and self-love, have a dive into it if you are ready!
Some Tips To Get You Going
While different forms of pleasure stimulate or excite different people, solo-sex or masturbation can at times be pretty daunting and can leave one feeling stressed or discontented. Here are a few tips to pull you through to your means of indulging in self-pleasure:-
- Pamper yourself for the exercise as foreplay is not just restricted to “partnered sex”. You may ready yourself in your favorite make-up or special dress or anything that makes you feel wanted so as to better the experience of self-indulgence!
- A series of non-sexual activities can be experimented with to set the stage for sensual action like enjoying an upbeat playlist to release stress, practicing mindfulness through breathing exercises, taking a hot shower and stretching so as to relax your body and improve arousal.
- Different temperatures can be experimented with, which can help to relax one’s body. In case colder sensations are preferred, rubbing ice on nipples or lips might help while a heated sex toy can be used for hotter sensations.
- Make it a holistic sensory exercise by paying attention to your whole body. Since masturbation majorly concerns self-pleasure, it must not be restricted to the erogenous zones but must be experimented with the entire body.
- Use non-toxic sex toys for stimulation and wash them with anti-bacterial liquid after each usage to maintain proper hygiene. People with vaginas are often recommended to use thrusters besides vibrators and dildos.
- Clean your surroundings and suit its aesthetics as per your mood for a better experience.
Conclusion
In a nutshell, it can be surmised that masturbation is a crucial means of exploring one’s desires and its methods vary from person to person. There is no ideal method to masturbate. It is just a process of sneaking out pleasure for oneself from anything that turns one on. All people with vaginas however do not masturbate though for myriad reasons. Some may not masturbate because of low sex drive, others because of its associated shame or lack of knowledge regarding it. Thus, masturbation is not a prerequisite for sexual drive but just a manifestation of it. Free dissemination of information on thee topic, more sensitivity towards the issue along with access to greater knowledge regarding the same can go a long way in normalizing the discourse on it and harness its overall benefits.
Cover Image: Feminism India
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1 thought on “Masturbation for Women: Is self-pleasure selfish?”
A very relevant and infomative well-written piece. The courage of the writer to take up such a stigmatised issue is a ray of hope in itself.